No Men

I've been getting it all wrong

the words running through my head before peter and I broke up

'single'

'independent'

'freedom'

are like misguided rumours...

I've been told to look around at the boys available

Dress seductively

- I've even launched myself onto some poor soul when I was drunk one night.

I've been thinking about them

and not about me

What do I want?

How do I feel?

I want to know me... what makes me tick

I want to be able to depend on myself

and nobody else

when it comes to happiness

I'll wear what I like and I'll eat what I like

and I'll go to the gym

for me, not for anybody else.

ah..... I like this. No men.

I get tired and stroppy and cry when I fall over

When I started up this blog, I saw 18 as old.

I thought I was heading directly towards adulthood,

yeah, sure, why not?

I definitely wasn't, i'm definitely still not.

When do you become an adult anyway?

How do you know?

It's my last week as an 'official 18 year old adolescent'

and yes, I work full time,

I live by myself...

I pay for my own food.

I make my own doctors and dentist appointments.

But I still call my mother, 'mummy'

I still have a cuddly toy

(his name is Target, he has a hairy chest, 3 legs and wears a frown)

I get tired and stroppy and cry when I fall over

and I'm hopelessly disorganised and forgetful.

I can't cook.

Maybe this is why I'm taking a gap year... I should probably grow up...

But maybe I should have as much fun as I possibly can

before that happens.

Happy Blogging

p.s. that's right, the rounded edges are back